He received his assignment yesterday. A list of names that are honestly meaningless to me. Areas were picked based on their proximity to where we live. He wants a short commute. Underneath it all, of course he wants to see action. No one goes into this expecting to sit behind a desk and push papers.
He got his second choice. I celebrated with him yesterday. No one got to go where his first choice was, so he still received the best option that was available to him. Today, he let slip that it’s a happening area. And not in a good way.
I sit here, eyes filled with unshed tears and don’t know what to do. I want to cry. I want to talk about how hard this is for me. How scared I am for him, for us. But I don’t want to burden him. I don’t want to weigh him down with my fear.
Right now, it feels like there’s no one to talk to about it all. No one who will understand. No one to share the burden. So I will sit, smile with him, and keep the tears at bay.
God keep him safe.