Choices

When I agreed to go dancing that night, I never imagined how quickly everything would change. The whirlwind that followed still leaves me dizzy when I think of it all.

When I gave him my number, I never dreamed he would remember me to text me the next morning, much less ask me out on a date that day. Yet ask he did and off we went, starting a journey that has taken us around the world.

When I said I would visit him, I never thought he would visit me first. Even further from my mind was the idea that he would profess love for me. Hearing those words released the dam in my own heart and we never looked back.

When I agreed to move in with him, I never entertained the idea that others would react so violently. “I won’t be happy for you until you have a ring on this finger” and “How should we pray for her to change her mind” were common statements around me. I also never told them that we had already discussed marriage but that we wanted to live on the same side of the country first.

When I moved in with him, I never believed we would be married and living abroad less than a month later. I couldn’t possible have seen that we would dwell in first Germany and then Turkey. Nor could I comprehend that sometimes a single choice truly does change everything.

When I made the choice to love him, I never realized I would lose them. I didn’t understand that when someone makes a choice to love and another denies that love that those people are put onto paths that travel ever farther apart.

When they made the choice to say no, they probably didn’t realize the corresponding door in my heart that would finally close. There is a lingering sadness, yet also a sense that life is about making the choice to love and not looking back with regret.

The one thing I do know and believe is that I made the right choice. I chose always to love and I will never regret that decision.

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About texancountess

I find myself in the calming roar of the sea, floating gently on the foam of the breaking waves. Blue. Green. Gray. The colors of the sea mark the boundaries of my soul. The tumbled glass finds its polish under the relentless pounding of the waves upon the shore. Thus am I. Rough transitioning to polish, refinement ever a process, finding my niche in the storms of life.
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