Still Choosing Happy

It’s working y’all.

I’m not saying everything is sunshine, roses, and unicorns, but it’s getting pretty damn close. I still have my moments of ups and downs, but choosing happy is becoming less of a choice and more of a reflex.

We’ve had a lot going on here this last month. I should be writing this from our new base in Turkey, but alas, I’m still on my couch in Germany. We still don’t have orders and we’re still not sure when we’ll get them. I won’t lie, this is freaking me out a bit. I’m not too thrilled by the idea of having to stay behind in Germany in order to get everything to the next base. But, and this is where it’s big, I’m not shutting down over it. It isn’t paralyzing me or leaving me feeling like I can’t do anything.

I have managed to get out and walk Loki for at least an hour at least every other day. I do it most days, but every now and then I have a lot going on and can’t get out there. I believe that this has helped tremendously. It’s not “Exercise” and it’s not going to the gym, so there’s no pressure on me there to do it or feel guilty. But it is exercise and I do get endorphins from it and just that little bit has helped so much. I feel best on the days that I get up and walk Loki before lunch.

It’s little things. Small changes. But they’re having a huge impact on my life right now. I feel better and more hopeful than I have in months. Sometimes I feel the sadness looming, like a shadowy monster waiting to descend on me; but that’s when I get up and do something else. Find something to distract me. I’m not going back.

I’ve chosen happy and that’s where I’m going to stay.

~The Countess~


About texancountess

I find myself in the calming roar of the sea, floating gently on the foam of the breaking waves. Blue. Green. Gray. The colors of the sea mark the boundaries of my soul. The tumbled glass finds its polish under the relentless pounding of the waves upon the shore. Thus am I. Rough transitioning to polish, refinement ever a process, finding my niche in the storms of life.
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2 Responses to Still Choosing Happy

  1. Stereo says:

    Glad for you, love. Happy certainly suits you. I do hope that you’ll find out about your orders soon; living in limbo cannot be any kind of fun.

  2. You seem to be doing the right things. Especially going for a walk. One thing though, go for a longer walk whenever you don’t feel like walking at all :)

    Having a mood swing day (or a bad day) is something we all get. But having a bad day and coping is truly rewarding! You will actually feel better if you do exercise (yes, walking is still good exercise – better than running at the gym, well, better for your joints!) whenever you feel like pulling the bed covers over your face in the morning.

    Keep it up, feel good, and remember to acknowledge self-successes and self rewards :)

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