My Disclaimer

So, I know my posts have gotten really heavy over the last week. Part of that is because the Reverb10 prompts are taking me into issues that I hadn’t planned on facing. Part of it is because I’m coming up on my first major holiday away from home and I’m stressed about getting home right after them. There are issues that are coming to a head in facing going home to see people who have claimed to be close to me but have dropped off the map since I’ve moved.

Also, I switched birth-control a week and a half ago. I’m now on a completely different method than I’ve ever done before and I can definitely tell that I’m going through an evening out phase. Now, the good news is that I’m feeling a whole lot more. The last set of pills that I took left me feeling flat or sad. I can feel happy again which is awesome. Bad news is that my sad is now sadder than it was before. I’ll take that as a trade off for getting to be happy though. I can also normally tell very easily when it’s my hormones screwing with my emotions.

Just know that I am happy. I’m enjoying my life over here. There are definitely frustrations. I haven’t met a single girl over here who has the potential to be a close friend. We have a very small group of acquaintances and are having a hard time expanding that. But, life with B is awesome. He’s great at listening to me, great at helping me work through things. He’s always willing to be my champion. We get to visit all kinds of crazy fun places. I’ve been to Belgium, I’ve been to Munich, we have plans to go to London and Paris.

Thigns are hard but they are good. Being married comes with the process of figuring out how to live with a person when you’ve realized that you can’t just walk away when you’re angry.

Reverb10 has helped direct me towards some of the harder parts of this last year in recent days, but that doesn’t change that this has been the best year of my life. It doesn’t change the fact that I’m incredibly happy where I am. It just means that life is a roller coaster with ups and downs. I’ve explored some of the big highs and now we’re delving into some of the lower lows.

So, no worries about how I’m doing. I love life, love my husband, love my friends and family.

~The Countess~

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About texancountess

I find myself in the calming roar of the sea, floating gently on the foam of the breaking waves. Blue. Green. Gray. The colors of the sea mark the boundaries of my soul. The tumbled glass finds its polish under the relentless pounding of the waves upon the shore. Thus am I. Rough transitioning to polish, refinement ever a process, finding my niche in the storms of life.
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4 Responses to My Disclaimer

  1. emjaye says:

    Reverb10 has definitely taken my blog in a different direction than I anticipated for the end of the year too. I don’t know what I was expecting from it, but if nothing else, it has made me think! Glad to hear you’re happy in your day-to-day!

  2. Shiny says:

    I can’t imagine going through the things you’ve gone through this year – the good and the bad. You are incredibly strong. Don’t feel bad about delving into the lows – it’s what makes you strong – your courage in facing it all.
    Love you, Miss you.
    <3,
    M

  3. Kim says:

    It sounds like you have had so much going on that the Reverb posts were bound to bring out some heavy writing… but the good stuff in your post is SO good. And fwiw, changing birth control is hard on almost everyone. It’s temporary, so I hope it’s on its way out.

    I loved reading your prompt responses. Good luck with the rest of the month!

    • Thanks so much. It has been a momentous year for sure. And the highs have been so high that there have to be lows to recover from them. I honestly think that I didn’t notice the lows as they happened because I was so caught up in the bliss of love. I glossed over the hard parts of what I was doing because the good parts were so worth it. Only now, in reflection, I’ve realized just how hard some of this year was and that it’s been undermining my emotional stability. So Reverb 10 has been awesome at helping me resolve these issues so that I am ready to face 2011 whole, happy, and recharged.

      Thanks also for the encouragement on the birth control. It’s already really starting to level out without leaving me flat. And I’ve only had this implant in my arm for 2 weeks, so here’s to it only getting better.

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