Wishful Wednesday

It’s mid-week and I have wishes on my mind today. I can’t help but think about all the stories with genies granting three wishes. The power and wonder of having any three things you want in the world. And yet, so often in these stories those wishes turn out to be a two-edged sword. The wishers end up ruing their choices or having to live with unintended consequences. I guess it’s because of the nature of stories to teach. And we’re supposed to be grateful for what we have and who we are now. Still, I like making wishes. I always make a little wish when I blow out birthday candles, though I haven’t done that in a couple of years. I guess, for me, a wish is like a dream goal. Something I would love to achieve or have. Dreaming is healthy. Reality slams us around all the time with a harshness suited for every day life. Wishes and dreams let us escape and hope to become more than our daily circumstances.

3 Things I would wish for right now:

1. To have my mommy here visiting. And my daddy and the rest of my family. I miss them.

2. To have a piano in my apt so I could just teach here. I enjoy teaching, but, I can already tell that all the driving is going to wear me down. That and I want to be able to sit down and play when I have the desire.

3. For my third wish I’m torn between wishing for friends and wishing for my belongings to all be here. I’ve been without my stuff for almost 2 months and I miss having a full wardrobe of clothes. I miss having my kitchen equipment and having the furniture to entertain. And yet, I think I would rather us have more friends. Living here is very isolating as far as that goes.

3 Things I wish for the past:

1. Gone back to Texas to say goodbye to family and friends before moving to Germany. I miss everyone and now I have no idea when I’ll get to see them again.

2. Had a proper wedding with the white gown and all of B and I’s family and friends in attendance. I’m thrilled to be married and I know we’ll have a ceremony someday, but, I feel tiny pangs of sadness when I overhear girls planning their weddings. I’ll never really have that now. I’ll never have the fun of bridal showers, bachelorette parties, lingerie showers. I’m glad we have a ceremony planned for some point in the future, but, it won’t be quite the same.

3. Made it through grad school without the debt I now have. We’ve already paid off my credit card this year. Now I’m just working on school loans. I get that the student loans are considered ‘good’ debt. But I still wish I didn’t have them. I still get chills when I see my credit card balance at zero. At the beginning of this year it seemed impossible. Then I got aggressive about paying it down. Then B paid it off a few days after our wedding. We don’t have any car payments, credit card payments, or other asundried debt. We both have student loans equaling about the same amount. I can’t wait for us to pay these off too so that we can be completely debt free.

3 Things I wish for the future:

1. To travel a lot with B. We have such great opportunities here in Germany and I hope that we will capitalize on them and see the world while we are living here.

2. To be able to build our dream house together some day. We like walking through houses and talking about what we do and don’t want in our mythical dream house. I want us to realize some of this.

3. To never lose my zest for life. For things to always be exciting between B and I. I never want to lose this young and in love feeling. It’s overwhelming and sweet. We have so much fun together and I always want it to be this way.

What do you wish for?

~The Countess~

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About texancountess

I find myself in the calming roar of the sea, floating gently on the foam of the breaking waves. Blue. Green. Gray. The colors of the sea mark the boundaries of my soul. The tumbled glass finds its polish under the relentless pounding of the waves upon the shore. Thus am I. Rough transitioning to polish, refinement ever a process, finding my niche in the storms of life.
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