Watching it fall apart

One of my aunts (Aunt H) had a Grand Mal seizure today. She’s in the hospital overnight while they stabilize her blood pressure. They also need to rerun the EKG and EEG as she was too stressed earlier for them to do the tests. My parents spent the day at the ER with her and my Aunt K. They’re the classic two spinster aunts that live together, have too many cats, and dote on their nieces and nephews.

Aunt H was diagnosed with Frontotemporal Dementia-Motor Neuron Disease the summer before I started my freshman year of college. She’d been having problems with her memory and paying attention to details. It’s a brutal disease. All forms of dementia are, but FTD-MND typically strikes people in their 40s and 50s. It also leaves them cognizant of the changes that are happening to them. At least with Alzheimer’s you have the comfort of knowing that they are blissfully unaware of what is going on. With FTD-MND, at least for my aunt, she is aware that she can no longer do things, like open doors, tie her shoes, sit down, feed herself. She is so smart. And now she’s trapped.

And the seizure is just another sign of the disease progressing. It’s so hard to watch her life fall apart. It’s so hard knowing that the end is near. I’m not ready to say goodbye, and yet, I know that this isn’t the life she would have chosen. For now though, it looks like she can go home tomorrow. And hopefully they can keep the seizures at bay. Perhaps we can gain a brief respite.

~The Countess~

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About texancountess

I find myself in the calming roar of the sea, floating gently on the foam of the breaking waves. Blue. Green. Gray. The colors of the sea mark the boundaries of my soul. The tumbled glass finds its polish under the relentless pounding of the waves upon the shore. Thus am I. Rough transitioning to polish, refinement ever a process, finding my niche in the storms of life.
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