Five for Friday, v. 5


one I’ve been planning a gallery wall to go along a staircase in our home for long before we’ve ever had a staircase. I love the idea of mixing paintings, pictures, signs, license plates and anything else I can find to create a wall with texture. I love that it tells the story of our life. Right now we mostly have wedding photos up there, since I just ordered free prints from the wedding, but I intend to mix in vacation photos too. It’s my modern spin on the old wall of pictures. 



two We spent last Sunday out on the beach playing volleyball and it was just the best. There was no pressure to be good and plenty of laughter. It was also a good reminder that beach season is here in SoCal. I’ve been getting up at 0515 every morning to hit the gym before work. My stress is down, I’m less tired, and the bonus is that my weight is down as well. I won’t pretend I don’t want to drop a few pounds, but the other two factors are way more awesome to me right now. 


three Our apartment complex brings in a food truck every three weeks or so and we’ve thoroughly embraces this aspect of LA culture. This week’s truck was MeSoHungry and it was beyond delicious. We ordered the Flying Hawaiian Chicken sliders and the KTM sliders – both were utterly amazing. After living in places with somewhat limited food options, it’s nice to have an overwhelming amount of good food to try. We try to hit at least one new place a week, which is all kinds of fun.  


four I’m slowly coming to accept our decision to rehome Sam. I know it’s the right one. She’s struggled with he stairs all week – slipping and sliding her way up and down them. It is both easier and harder knowing how excited my inlaws are to have her. Easier because their joy is contagious. Harder because I’m still losing my baby girl. It’s pretty funny though, after all this time of my FIL talking about how much he would take Loki and how he wasn’t ever going to get another dog, he’s head over heels for the idea of having Sam. Still, it’s hard to know I won’t have both of them watching me come up the stairs anymore. One more week.



five Something that I’m blaming on my rapidly approaching thirtieth birthday is my utter acceptance and happiness with myself. I’ve recently come to determine that I’m pretty and don’t need to hide behind a wall of makeup. I’m also embracing my love of color and wearing what makes me happy, regardless of if it is cool or not. There’s something crazy exciting about deciding to accept and love yourself. I’m not even sure I decided though, it just sort of happened. If this is that mellow chillness people refer to when talking about how awesome their thirties are/were – I can’t wait to experience more of it.  

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

She Rescued Me

my baby girl

my baby girl

I remember seeing her for the first time. Standing in the too-empty living room, she was bouncing at the back door, quivering as she begged for attention. We stepped outside and I crouched down, she immediately snuggled into me. I gazed down into her deep brown eyes and instantly made a promise from my heart to hers – she would be loved and she would be taken care of for always.

my loves

my loves

She came home and stuck to me like glue. In the kitchen, she would curl up directly behind my feet. On the couch, her bony hips would press into mine leaving an ache that never quite would go away. In the bathroom, she would always try to follow me in and would sit and cry by the door if I didn’t let her. I had to sit with her while she was eating, even hand feeding her at times just to get her to eat. Nothing was too much for my beloved rescue.

pretty girl on a pretty day

pretty girl on a pretty day

Turkey was not an easy place for me. Which is a nice way to say that Turkey was the darkest period of my life. Turkey was home to too many deaths. Turkey was home to a deep anguish that pervaded my very being and left me with a lead weight in my chest instead of my heart. Turkey was home to not knowing how I would keep going.

I was lost. Worse, I wasn’t sure how to find myself. Until she rescued me. She gave me purpose, I made a promise and I had to keep it. I had to get out and walk her. I had someone who sensed my every mood and would put her head on my lap to tell me it was okay because I wasn’t alone. As she gained strength and confidence, I recovered little pieces of my broken heart and soul. As she blossomed into herself, she knit me back together again.

I promised to keep her happy, whole, and safe. I just didn’t know that she would do the same for me. Today, we’re both much better. Today, the only thing threatening to tear me apart is keeping my promise to her.

She isn’t doing well here. There are lots of factors to it, but the reality is that she’s failing to thrive here. My in-laws have offered to give her a good home. They’re excited to have her join them and will spoil her absolutely rotten. But it’s breaking my heart to do right by her. I do know it’s best for her to go live with them. And I will keep my promise to her, but my own heart and soul feel incredibly fragile right now.

I thought I had rescued her, but the truth is that she rescued me.

Posted in Deep Thoughts, Life | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment


It’s beach weather here in SoCal. The days are gorgeously sunny, the nights are still crisp and cool, and the sun is perpetual. I’m pretty sure I’m living in heaven. People keep trying to complain about it being too hot and I’m just not hearing them. I spent a whole year not seeing temperatures above 75 degrees Fahrenheit. I think I’ve earned my actually-warm-enough-for-a-bikini weather. Yep.

We’re heading to the beach tomorrow to hang out with some of B’s classmates. He’s promised that they’re bringing significant others. I don’t mind hanging out with the guys, but it would be nice to meet some of the girlfriends/wives/what have you of the people he’s in class with. We’re doing brunch at an awesomely boozy spot and then hanging out and playing volleyball for awhile. I’m pretty excited about the fun we should have.

Work has been an interesting mix of ups and downs for me. The ups are that I have leeway to do what I want regarding pretty much everything. The downs are not getting paid on time due to interpersonal issues in our office (seriously, if it happens again, I’m lodging a formal complaint with the partners), and other people doing stupid things that reflect poorly on the firm. I’ve earned 4 hours of “overtime” which they don’t pay, so I get it in comp time. I’m hoping to take off a day B already has off and enjoy a three day weekend with him.

I started working on our gallery wall today. I’ve been obsessed with mixed media gallery walls for quite some time now. Ours has paintings that I’ve done of all the states/countries we’ve lived in (except California! I need to fix that!), pictures from our wedding/travels, and license plates/signs from living overseas. I’m hoping to add more travel/wedding pictures, pictures of the dogs, and a couple of small signs to tie everything together. Regardless, having our pictures on the walls makes this place feel more like home.

I told B today that I was feeling my biological clock ticking. At least so far as owning a home is concerned. I’m tired of renting. I’m aching under the knowledge that we’re going to pay over 30k this year in rent. That we’ll never see back. But, we’re also not quite in the place to buy. Next year, when our lease is up, will be perfect, but that doesn’t make it easy to avoid open houses or searching/dreaming of owning a home. Surprisingly, hanging all of our artwork has actually helped make this place feel more like home. Which, makes me more content to stay here for another 11 months. Even if what I really want is to buy. If you know anyone who wants to sell a townhome with a small yard in the South Bay area of LA, let me know. Haha.

I’m still worrying about my Sam. Today, I had all the pictures laid out on the floor for the gallery wall, so B called her upstairs. It took her three or four tries to get up them. She kept falling and it was clear that she was uncomfortable/in pain/not happy about going up them. It hurts me. I don’t know what to do for her. Do I give her to my in-laws, knowing they will love her and she won’t have stairs but will miss us or do I keep her with us but know that she will continually struggle with the stairs? Sometimes it seems like a no-brainer. But mostly, my heart hurts and I can’t make a good decision.

Posted in Life | 2 Comments

Quick Update

These last couple of weeks have turned into a whirlwind. Between navigating boxes and both of us working, it seems like we barely have time to breathe much less do anything else. It doesn’t help that B’s schedule is such that we’re in bed by 2100, always. But, I’m the one lately asking if it’s bedtime yet, typically an hour or two prior to bed. 

I’m absolutely loving my job, but due to its go-go-go nature during the day, I typically come home exhausted. Not that it’s a bad thing, more I just need to figure out how I’m going to handle it. I know I need to adapt. Hopefully I’ll be able to get my feet under me shortly so I can start to calm things down. Then again, I’m working in a legal office, things may never really calm down. 

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Five for Friday v.4

And so it’s the weekend, and what have we done. Another week over, a new one not yet begun.

That’s how it goes, right? I have never had a job this much fun to work and this exhausting. Every day is a marathon from start to finish. I’m never not busy. Most days I barely remember to eat lunch. And I’m loving every second of it. But, now more than ever, I’m wishing that three day weekends were every weekend. Sometimes I wonder how much of our lives would be improved if we all worked four and threes instead of five and twos.

one This week has been full of learning experiences. About the only negative experience has been with the office drama-llama. On my first day, I was asking my training coworker about dress code and the drama-llama jumped down my throat about how their boss was out of town and it was okay for them to be dressed more casually. I treated it as an aberrance, but that unfortunately hasn’t been the case. The drama-llama has jumped down my throat multiple times this week and generally acted like the long-time employee who is merely suffering my presence. Only for me to learn today that they only predate me at the company by a few weeks. See also, they tried to throw me under the bus today to one of our bosses while also yelling at this boss. It didn’t go well. Here’s hoping they straighten up. The good news is that they’ve been instructed to be unfailingly polite to me and I’ve been told I do not have to put up with the behavior whatsoever.

two B had to be up at 0300 on Thursday morning, so we went to bed on Wednesday at 2000. I was exhausted and fell asleep immediately, which never happens. Unfortunately, around 2130, some idiot burned their dinner and opened their front door, setting off the building fire alarms. We all evacuated and stood in the cool night air for 20 minutes, B all groggy and holding the dogs, me with my purse, his wallet, and our important documents folder, until everything stopped so we could go back in. The bad news for me was that the power nap combined with the adrenaline meant that I didn’t fall asleep again until after 2330.

three We’ve been struggling with the reality that Sam, our German Shepherd isn’t adapting super well to this apartment. She has bad hips, and we not only live on the fourth floor, but we have a loft in our apartment which means more stairs. The loft is set up as our living room, so there are times when we make multiple trips up and down that she’ll choose to stay downstairs instead of coming back up to join us. She also sometimes falls up and/or down the stairs. It’s rough. B’s parents offered to keep her for us, which led us to a breaking point. I cried for two hours straight yesterday trying to talk about it. Ultimately, we’ve decided she’s staying with us for now. I think she’s happiest with us and she’s hanging in there. We’ve also decided to use the elevator as much as possible when taking her all the way downstairs to minimize how much she has to be on the stairs. I’m also upping her hip and joint supplement amounts to see if that helps too. Hopefully we can establish with a vet soon and get to work on making her as healthy as we can.

four We’re getting together with some old friends tomorrow for brunch. I’m super excited to see them again. We saw the husband back in December for a quick lunch and it was just like old times. Hilariously enough, the last time we lived near them, back in Germany they were expecting their first child, now they’re expecting their second. I’m really hoping that we can all reconnect and that we’ll have a set of friends here in town again. See also, I’m hoping the wife has a hairdresser she can recommend that won’t be too expensive. My root situation is getting pretty bad.

five I want all the work clothes. Blazers in neutral colors, bright blouses, neutral pencil skirts in fun prints. I want it all. I was complimented by a client today on my Aztec print pencil skirt and it reminded me how much I like having put together looks that are both fun and professional. I need to be more professional in this job than any prior, so I’m looking to trade out my cardigans for more blazers. Now to just get paid so I can finance this new wardrobe.

Posted in Life | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments


The movers are coming tomorrow! Only a week after they did pick up in ND and they’re ready to deliver to us here in CA. I’m beyond stoked. These movers have been such a joy to work with – they pushed for the earlier pick up date (tomorrow is actually the original date they were scheduled to get our stuff) and they’ve moved super quickly. They called this morning and were like, “would it be okay to deliver everything tomorrow?”

Of course, that means I have to do all the organizing myself, but that’s okay. They’re not coming until a bit later in the morning (trading everything down to a smaller truck) which will give me time to break down our temporary furniture and go store it in my car. There’s a lot of stuff to get put away, but it will give me something to do while waiting.

We walked around our loft again talking about where to put things. B has been really insistent about having the couch on the far wall along with the desk. He finally realized my point, that having the couch against the railing and the TV/desk sharing the same wall makes way more sense. Which is good, because that’s how it was going to be anyway. Logistics, y’all. No other way for it to happen.

And then it will be the mad rush of unpacking. We have a lot of stuff coming, so things definitely will have to get put away sooner rather than later. I’m super grateful they’re delivering prior to my gaining employment. I’ll have something to do during the day and we won’t be scrambling to take care of this after work hours only.

Posted in Life | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Five on Friday v.3


It has been an utterly gorgeous week here in SoCal. Sunny, blue skies that are uninterrupted by clouds. Weather that’s just warm enough during the day and just cool enough at night. The perfect amount of a breeze to stir the air and feel refreshing. We’ve pretty much moved to paradise.

one We’ve full on embraced the resort style living of our complex this week. Tonight is only our seventh here and we’ve already hit the hot tubs three times. In addition, we’ve made use of the propane grills to make dinner once already, with two more grilled meals planned this weekend. Finally, we reserved the 100 inch screen in the theater for a Saturday night, Valentine’s Day game fest. We’re also planning to host B’s squad for a pool party soon. Needless to say, we’re both super pleased with our decision to relocate here.

two I’ve been loving the humidity here. If the humidity sits just far enough over 50%, my hair starts to curl/wave on its own. I fully embrace this by using some cream, a spritz of hairspray and then scrunching it to air dry. If I want it more polished, I’ll throw in a few curls on top with my curling wand. Otherwise? I’m heat free. I love not blowing it out and straightening it all the time.

three My job hunt is trucking along. I’ve had a couple of interviews and have a couple more in the works. My biggest problem is that I’m not sure what I want to do. I feel like I’m standing at a crossroads and I could go down a multitude of paths. The good news is that if I go down one and don’t like it, I have no problem abandoning ship. That said, I do hope to have an income again sooner rather than later.

four I’ve been working my way through a running program again and I’m about to hit the steady runs of at least 25 minutes and I’m scared of them. All of a sudden my excitement to start my day this way has fled and I’m milking the excuses to not do it. Which is sad. I’m struggling with being slower than I was before my surgery, but logically I know I can’t get faster again unless I run consistently. Also, B is looking mighty fine thanks to his academy training and I do not want to be left behind as we are always in beach weather here.

five Speaking of B, he suggested a new plan this past week which touched me and made me smile. His idea is that we will pick a new restaurant every weekend to try out. We love eating out and exploring new restaurants is totally an us thing. But, what makes it special is that it was 100% his suggestion. I’m excited to explore the culinary offerings to be found here.

Happy Weekend my friends!

Posted in Life, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment